The
Deadly Sins of Desolation RP |
After
RolePlaying Desolation for years now, I've finally reached my limit
of the crap that is thrown my way during a Combat RP Session.
Don't
get me wrong... the players of Desolation can sit peacefully in
a bar, sip on a Nuka Cola while reading a pre-holocaust nudie magazine
with their buddies hanging out nearby, socializing and talking about
the latest gossip. They can RP social interaction very well... a
lot better than most MUDs I've ever played.
But,
introduce the aspect of roleplaying a situation where guns are drawn,
knives are clutched, and innocent bystanders hide because they know
some serious violence is going to take place... all of that intelligent,
witty banter and common logic that the players displayed suddenly
vanishes, and they act as if the world doesn't have the Laws of
Physics any more. The "realism" is reduced to people jumping
all over the place, dodging bullets, attacking important areas of
the body, and absorbing damage as if a knife gash across the face
is something you can just rub in, like sun-tan lotion.
I
call these acts the Deadly Sins of Role-Play... things that have
ultimately driven me to take a break from interacting with the other
people and their characters, and go back to simply building areas
and making items, mobs, and the occassional armor. They're considered
Sins because when they're commited, they can cause other players
have the same reaction I did when they felt like everybody acted
as if they were in an action movie.
I
sometimes want to pull out a megaphone and yell out: "HEY!
LET'S GET JOHN WOO IN HERE, AND MAKE A BOX-OFFICE SMASH OUTTA THIS
SHIT!!!"
Devil
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Thou
Shalt Not "No Sell" An Attack |
They
shrug off damage. They have this attitude that unless you're being
fired at by a minigun, rocket launcher, blown up by land-mines,
or being gunned down by an entire hispanic firing-squad (a la Zorro),
they can shrug off bullet wounds, take a stab to the gut, get hit
in the temple with a crowbar, or get their ribs stomped on by a
super mutant get back up because "they have strong armor!"
They
don't seem to realize that any firearm is potentially DEADLY...
taking a puncture/bludgeoning wound to a vital organ (i.e. stabbed
in the stomach, punched in the kidneys, etc.) will cause internal
damage... and that for some reason anything smaller than a .50-caliber
round fired from a Barret M82A1 "Light Fifty" anti-personnel
sniper rifle is unable to pierce their armor.
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Thou
Shalt Not Expect to Kill |
That
they make too many lethal attacks. Unless you hear the other guy
say in OOC: "Go ahead and kill this character. I'm sick of
him... blah blah", you shouldn't trigger a burst from an assault
rifle towards anybody's head, chest, stomach, or spine. This is
common sense, folks. Players could be out shopping for bullets,
and somebody rubs them the wrong way. Suddenly, Player-A is trying
to smash Player-B's skull in with a sledgehammer while Player-B
is attempting to fire an M79 40mm grenade launcher at his opponent's
face. Even if it's just a simple barfight, the players here end
up draining a clip from a Desert Eagle into one another's liver
and spleen, and suddenly don't expect the other guy to die from
it.
For
example, Stryker acted SHOCKED when his dual DE .44 attack
tore through Maynard's insides like a fat bitch rushing the stage
at an N'Sync concert... because he actually expected Maynard to
dodge out of the way from a cloud of incoming bullets, or that his
flimsy recon-armor would hold out on such an onslaught. I mean,
if you want to tap the clips dry into someone's chest, buy a .22
or a .38... a weapon caliber that you know for a fact most kevlars
can readilly protect against, leaving your foe stunned on the floor
clutching a broken rib as he tries to catch his breath...or just
aim for the shoulder or the arm if you don't want to end the life
of somebody's character. Not every shot has to be with the intent
to kill.
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Let
No Corrupt Communication Proceed Out of Your Mouth |
They
argue and bitch about taking damage. When you suddenly remind them
of the laws of physics, that a chunk of metal going 600+ feet-per-second
colliding with human flesh will actually cause immense pain, or
that the twelve-inch serrated blade of a combat knife finding its
way between your shoulder-blades often immobilzes you, they like
to make the lamest excuses.
Example:
Patsy: "Well, after getting shot in the shoulder, my adrenaline
kicked in, so I could push myself harder so that I could keep fighting!"
Devil:
"Well, how are you still using that arm to punch me if it got
hit by a 12-gauge load of flechette from a double-barreled semi-automatic
combat shotgun?"
Patsy:
"...uhh... I got Combat Armor."
Gunshot
wounds often make the body go into shock long before you get that
over-used "adrenaline rush" going... plus, flechette rounds
are a menace because they can find their way through the weaving
of most kevlar meshes in flak jackets or bullet-proof vests, and
would most likely turn the arm into a bloody inside-out meat stump
if used at close range...
Or,
in hand-to-hand, they suddenly assume that your character is a big
hulking slow brute with Down's Syndrome, while they assume the role
of Jackie Chan. They dodge every attack you make, then counter it
with their own, and expect YOU to hit the canvas mat first. Nevermind
if you RP the role of a wiry Super Mutant brawling expert who's
seen more fights than a French whore on payday, and who's killed
more people in underground boxing matches than Mike Tyson with Tourette's
Syndrome... to them, you're still just a slow, hulking idiot, that
moves in perpetual slow-motion, while they're Bruce Lee on amphetamines.
Each side will continue to fight, devaluing the other guy's attacks
because each side honestly believes that their character is the
superior brawler. They will continue to scrap, refusing to lose,
and defying any aspect of reality until one of the contestants has
to get off the computer. Sometimes a fight can last for two hours
straight, until the one who has to get off first loses, or the match
ends in a draw. It's pathetic.
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Thou
Shalt Not Experience 'Bullet Time' |
This
is what I call "The Matrix Factor". Somehow in this MUD,
whenever a bullet leaves the chamber it slows down to the point
where you can tackle your friend out of the way, dodge the bullet
yourself, roll to cover behind a large rock, and light up a cigarette
before it even soars off into the horizon. At least, that's what
the players act like. Whenever confronted by a horde of hostile
gang members that begin spraying a room with Uzi's, the potential
victim will spring to his or her heels, leaping and dodging the
bullets with amazing cat-like grace, all the while returning fire
as they do their ballet steps through a killing zone. People also
believe that if a friend of theirs is being fired at, they can dive
in at the last second and tackle them out of the way, rescuing their
sorry ass from the clutches of death.
Yeah. Right. Somehow, somebody laden with body armor, an assault
rifle, a few dozen clips, and a field backpack is capable of running
over and knocking their companion over from a bullet that's on its
way. It's the same as saying: "Oh, let's just ignore the fact
that a nine-millimeter moves at several hundred feet per second,
so I can nudge Tom here out of the way... (scoot scoot)..."
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Thou
Shalt Bear False Witness Against Thy Armor |
Kevlar
Vest + Verra-Carbon Pants does NOT = Power Armor
This
is one of the funniest Sins one can encounter... and one of the
most annoying. It seems that once combat initiates, the fighters'
Armor Class goes up about sixty points or so. If their armor includes
the words: "kevlar", "Combat", or "reinforced",
it somehow becomes nigh-impenetrable, and can withstand anything
between shotgun blasts to a kick in the groin.
One
hilarious example of this was when Lucus was shot repeatedly by
"Felix The Cat", the assassin. He didn't dodge the bullets
like Keanu Reeves dressed up like a member of the Trenchcoat Mafia,
nor did one of his friends swan-dive from ten yards away to tackle
him out of the bullets' path... however, his (heh heh heh...), get
this, bone & leather armor blocked several rounds of nine-millimeter
to the torso.
No,
really. He really used that one.
C'mon...
stop laughing.
Ok...
yeah, I know it's funny. So, as I was saying, people severely overrate
their armor's worth. I've seen people receive wicked knee-cap shots,
and try to roleplay that the armor plates in their reinforced pants
deflected the shot. Or that their kevlar helmet stopped a 7.62mm
round at close range. It's one thing to get shot in the chest with
a sawed-off and get knocked on your ass by the buckshot hitting
you in the ribs, withstand a nasty stab due to your kevlar vest,
or be able to take a solid blow to the noggin from a crowbar because
of your combat helmet, but a majority of the damage "blocked
by armor" is in most cases horrifically unrealistic. Unless
your character is wearing a full-body suit of ServoTech Mark-VII
Power Armor, there's always a chance of a bullet sneaking its way
past your "second skin", or a knife blade carving a path
through the weaker parts between the plating.
And
just because you've got armor on doesn't mean there's no impact.
If somebody golf-club swings a sledgehammer into your Combat Armor's
chestpiece, it still has a helluva lot of force behind it, and will
more than likely break a rib or two. It doesn't matter if there's
a big pillow duct-taped to you for added cushioning... there's still
momentum, impact, and
inertia behind whatever's hitting you. I get very tired of watching
people simply stand there without any sort of feedback from an attack
because they believe their gear could absorb the blow. Sure, that
crowbar to the side of your kevlar helmet might not crack your skull
open, but it'll still send your head jerking to the side, you know?
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To
wrap this up, these sins and taboos have been tainting the quality
of many RP-Log Submissions and character interaction alike. Why
would you want to RP a fight or read the log of an encounter with
somebody if you knew was going to try to shoot you in the face,
dodge a grenade blast, take scrapnel to the kneecaps, and still
expect to win?
I
wouldn't either.
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