Short Stories of Insanity

Chapter1
 Slugs And Stuff

The Happy Little Tree

Once upon a time there was a tree
Then one day, the tree got bored, and left.
It attacked a small village.
The Mayor set loose an angry band of termites.
The termites got rid of the tree, but they ate the houses in the village.
That was the end of the happy little tree.

The End

The 4 Little Slugs

Once upon a time, 4 Little Slugs lived in a fuzzy little cottage.
One day, the man that owned the cottage, spilled some salt (oh no!)

The End

Dirt

Once upon a time there was a piece of dirt

The End

The Retarded Little Duck

Once upon a time, there was a little duck.
His name was Quackers.
One day he followed some chickens into a meat packaging factory.

The End

The Ocean That Had To Go

There once was an ocean that had to go to the bathroom.
One day, giant yellow waves started crashing into the beach
"Its ok to go back kids, its at low tide."

The End

Attack of the Big Mac

Once upon a time, an old man got a job at McDonnald's.
He put his dentures in a hamburger bun, and started to make it talk.
He made it say, "What would you do, if a hamburger bit you?"
One of his coworkers grabbed the hamburger, and put it in a bag.
A man outside in the drive through was heard saying.
"Ouch, this hamburger bit me!!"

The End

Chapter2
 Mary Had . . . And Other New York Hookers

Mary Had A Little Lamb...

Marry had a little lamb,
with a side of fries and a large pepsi.

The End

Mary Had A Brand New Car

Mary had a brand new car,
A paint job white as snow.
And every where that Mary drove,
The birds were sure to go...

The End

Mary Had A Bad Hair Day

Mary had a bad hair day,
With dandruf as white as snow
And everywhere that Mary combed,
The lice were sure to grow.

The End

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