GAT (Gangsta Aptitude Test)

Face it, the Public Schools systems are run by a bunch of Bleeding hearts that want to strip all the authority away from the teachers and give it to the students. No wonder math skills amongst us Americans suck so bad when compared to other countries. Maybe if we gave tests like this we would come out on top.

The following exam was administered as an Ebonics version of the SAT:



1) You just robbed som jack mo fo with $20 in his wallet.
You can buy:

A dime and two 40's

B. A new pair of Fila's

C. Dashikki down the block

D. Yo mama

2) It's tha end of da monf again and da man is on your jack for da rent.

A. Bust a cap in his ass

B. Say, "Shit man, why you all up in ma bidness?"

C. Have anuther kid on welfare

D. Yo mama

3) You and ya holmes are banging down da block when yall scam da uther mo fo's commin your way. If ya both jaking your hydros, and both yall draw yur gats,
Which of da following happens:

A. Shit goes down in da hood

B. Ya check yur colours and let the cop-killers fly

C. Shit man, I do'no maff

D. Yo mama

4) You drink haff a 40. How much is left:

A. Haff

B. Da uther haff

C. Zum mo

D. Bout enuff to jak yo mama

5) You, beein da shit you are, dress yo self in da morn in which of deese:

A. Yo Tek 9 with da Raiders hat

B. Da AK47 with yo Fila's

C. You blade and ya colurs

D. "Shit man, what's a nigga like me doin up at dis time in da morn?"

6) Tiz yo 21st birfday. You:

A. Hook up with Dashikki down the block and treat her to MceeDees

B. Treat yo self to crack, ice cream, and 40's

C. Gaffle da man

D. I do'no maff


1) Johnny has an AK-47 with a 40 round clip. If he misses 6 out of ten shots & shoots 13 rounds at every drive- by shooting, how many drive-by shootings can he attend before he has to reload? What is the maxium number of people he can hit?


2) Jose' has 2 ounces of cocaine. He sells a 8-ball to Ricky for $320, & 2 grams to Juan for $85 per gram. How many ounces does he have left? What is the street value of the remaining coke?


3) Rufus is pimping three girls. If his cut is $65 per trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Rufus can support his $800 per day crack habit?


4) Jerome wants to cut his 1/2 lb. of heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces will he need?


5) Willie gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Chevy, & $100 for a 4x4. If he has stolen 2 BMW's & three 4x4's, how many Chevy's will he have to steal to make $1000?


6) Raoul is serving 6 years in prison for murder. He was paid $10,000 for the hit. If his comman-law wife is spending $100 per month , how much money will be left when he gets out of prison (w/ time off for good behavior /overcrowding) & how many years will he get for killing the bitch that spent his money?


7) If the average spray can covers 22 square feet & the average letter is 8 square feet, how many letters can a tagger spray if he steals 3 full cans of paint & finds 1 can of paint 1/3 empty?


8) Hector knocked up 6 of the girls in his gang. There are 28 girls in the gang. What percentage of the girls has Hector knocked up?


9) Thelma can cook dinner for her 16 children for $7.50 per night. She gets $234 a month welfare for each child. If her $325 per month rent goes up 15%, how many more children should she have to keep up with her expenses?


10) Salvador was arrested for dealing crack & his bail was set at $25,000. If he pays a bail bondsman 12% & returns to Mexico, how much money will he lose by jumping bail?



1) Wher iz da mutherland at:

A. Afrika

B. Compton

C. Souff Centra

D. Yo mama

2) What am da capita of California?

A. Da Hood

B. Compton

C. Los Angeles

D. The Ghetto


1) Tek 9 : Gatt ::

A. Yo mama : Dashikki

B. Fila's : Nike

C. Tu pac : Barry White

D. St. Ive's : Colt 45

2) Malt Liquor : Da Chronic ::

A. Da Man : Da Systum

B. ReeRun : MC Hammer

C. Fat Albert : Shaft

D. Yo mama : Dashikk


Now lookie here foo. I gots to axe you an exxay quextiun:
In 25 wurds mo o less, tell uz me who am da man?